Its Almost Time.

"There are many things that i would like to say to you, but i cant find the words in my head."-Diane Birch(Rewind)

yea, i really do miss you i guess. wow, two months on monday.

Gone.

I hate you for abandoning me when i needed you most.
I hate you for not being there.
I hate you because you dont exist to me anymore.
I hate you because its so much easier than thinking about the good times with you.
I hate everything because its no longer the same.

"nothing stays the same forever"

you werent joking...

Changes.

I want everything to go back to normal.
No more changes.
pleaseee.

Back to school Week.

Yes, the back to school night is back.
the night where we all have to assemble the perfect outfits and have the perfect hairstyle and arrive in the perfect way so that maybe we might have a fighting chance at liking school. well ill be honest...tonigt thats me. why? well for the past five years the first day of school has meant anxiety and headaches the night before. tonight, ive had an epiphany..."new me" usually i never ever follow this rule but i beleive that the sayne " i think, there for i do" should be practiced daily because with that we find the strength in us we never saw. so tomorrow will be just that for me, even though my other half is in colorado and this is the first year ive had to go to school without her for the last five yeas and the fact that i didnt really get the guy, there is always one thing that im going to remember this year for times when the going gets tough.

It only gets better from here.

Yours Truly,

Chloe B.

Time machines.

Watching coraline. missing my other half. wishing he wasnt the way he is.Hoping ill wake up in the morning and find a time machine waiting in the living room with my name on it. I want everything to go back to normal, but like they say...nothing stays the same forever.

"yoo hoo, you with me today?" ughh, i hated that phrase, yoo hoo? no more like the choclate milk that rots your teeth, not a way to get somebodys attention, but that was amanda for you. " sorry what did you say?" i managed to croak, i was just so tired these days, and felt out of reality. " i saidddd whats the square root of 79, its question number 12" she said this with a sarcastic edge to her voice, goshhh i hated her in the morning. i looked at her quizically "seriously?" was all i could say without letting the cuss words stampede over my lips. " oopps, guess i forgot about the whole" alexandra sucks at math thing" i looked her face over for the "again, i managed to put you down before noon smile" but it wasnt there, that was a first. " you didnt forget, you just didnt want to make me feel like an idiot, well congrats you just did." i picked up my books in an angry whirlwind and spun out the library door in a huff, i just couldnt handle anything these days without finding something to get pissed at.

unamed

Preface.

I couldn’t tell you the date. I couldn’t tell you the time, or the way the sun was positioned in the sky that day. I couldn’t tell you the way the grass swayed when the breeze blew through every inch of me sending angry tremors down my spine. I could only tell you that that was the day my belief in fate occurred. Engulfing me like the waves would do to the hot summerthe sand. i walked slowly towards the one who seemed to know my every move before it even occured. he was gorgeous in every way in that single moment, like nothing could even compare, the thought of running as fast as i could before my mind got wrapped in the many ways that i was going to love him came at me fast, but i just nudged it in the other direction. finally, the time came for the answer to my qusetion which i was thirsting for. "What are you?" i asked as my voice shook, for fear that the answer i was going to get would be one that i would regret knowing. He turned unstartled,like he already knew id been there,at the sound of my voice, but only to look at me with his gorgeous green eyes that seemed to ignite a blazing fire in my heart everytime we made eye contact, he grimaced for a second but then his face eased into a mysterious gaze "your other half" was all he said but with that i took his hand in mine and slowly exhaled, this was the moment that defined the rest of my life.